This Freakin' "Islam is the Light" Thing

Alright, you can read here if you want at GamePolitics, but basically the story is that a mom thought she heard a baby in the DS game Baby Pals say "Islam is the light." I have several numbered points to make about this bovine fecal matter:

1. "Islam is the light" isn't even a real phrase that anyone uses. A quick Google search for the phrase reveals that this story is apparently the only place anyone has thought to say it. I've never heard of this as a real phrase within the Muslim world.

2. It's freakin' baby talk. If you're thinking ahead of time, as you most certainly will be, you can think it sounds like "Islam is the light". That doesn't mean that some company got a baby to say that specifically, as they most certainly wouldn't have tried to coach the baby to say something specific at all.

3. This represents a dangerous and hurtful paranoia in America. "Islam" does not mean "evil" or "terrorist" or even "bad." I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir here, so whatever.

4. What a stupid evil plot. Yes, all of us doll and video game manufacturers (or perhaps just the sound effects company they licensed it from) are so evil, cunning, and Muslim, that we're going to make people think they're hearing baby talk, when in fact they're hearing praise of the Muslim religion! Then they'll... Be entirely unaffected until they complain about it and boycott the products. Bwa ha ha ha ha!

So, yeah, it's stupid, but you already knew that. For a slightly more entertaining version of the story, you can check out Penny Arcade as well.

Skate 2 Trophy/Achievement Guide

Here you go, tips and tricks to earn the trophies and achievements of Skate 2, from the writer of the walkthroughs for Skate 1 and 2, me.

Bronze

1. On Top Of The World - Perform an invert on one of the highest points in the city in career mode - Just wait until you unlock the SV Peak, then do a handplant on a ramp there. That's the easiest way if not the fastest.
   
2. Skater Evolved - Get off your board in career mode - You'll need to do this just to get through the tutorial
   
3. I Like To Move It - Move your first object in career mode - You'll need to do this just to get through the tutorial
4. That's the Way - Beat all of Danny Way's film challenges- Consult my Skate 2 walkthrough for Mahalo.
   
5. GVR Champ - Win the GVR Contest - The final challenge in the street contests.
   
6. Big Air Champ - Win the San Van-a-Slamma- The final challenge in the tranny contests.
   
7. Still Alive? - Win a Deathrace in career mode
8. Race Hero - Win all races in career mode
   
9. Where's my TV show? - Beat all Rob Dyrdek challenges- Consult my Skate 2 walkthrough for Mahalo.
10. Meet Slappy - Meet Slappy- You'll need to do this just to get through the tutorial
11. New San Van Hero - Call Mikey 10 times- Just every time you see that little crowbar icon in the upper left corner of your screen, use Mikey's service. Cruise around downtown if you really can't just get this over time.
    
12. Pull the Plug - Drain every pool and fountain in career mode- There are 7 pools and several fountains. You can find all the pools after the game is over, as the remaining Thrasher missions will take you to them, but I can't find a simple map at this moment, check back here for me to upload one. Check this picture out for what the secret extra fountain looks like.
    
13. Real Estate Mogul - Purchase all property in career mode- There are only 2 properties: the Fun Track and the Monster Clubhouse. You can buy the Monster Clubhouse for 200,000 dollars after beating the team challenges.
    
14. Fully Sponsored - Obtain all sponsorships- Basically just beat every challenge, you get a different sponsor depending on which line of challenges you have just finished.
    
15. The Architect - Upload a created spot
16. The Critic - Rate 10 community videos and photos
17. Pwn some n00bs - Win an online ranked match
18. Amateur Skater - Achieve Amateur Rank Online- I believe this requires only getting 1 bronze medal (100 xp) in one of the six event types.
    
19. Graphically Extreme - Add a custom graphic to your skater- As in, create a custom board or other piece of merchandise in the edit skater screen.
    
20. Dethrowned - Download and own a community-created spot
21. Skater's Choice - Win the Skater's choice award in an online ranked match- This is the little thumbs up next to a skater on the final standings in a Hall of Meat or Spot Battle match-up. It's based on who voted for who with the face buttons online, usually rewarding consistency or hilarious wipeouts in Hall of Meat.
    
22. Juggling Chainsaws - Wipeout at high speed in career mode- Not sure exactly what speed counts as high speed, but just roll down Cougar Mountain or the Rez roads for a bit before crashing.
    
23. Skitched Up - Skitch for 1000 meters or 3000 feet in career mode- Skitch by pressing R1 or the corresponding Xbox 360 button (someone tell me what that is) while behind a car. You may need to swing around behind it in the correct direction before turns so you don't fall away from it.
    
24. Make it Big! - Use Big Black's service 10 times in Career Mode- If you want, you can just hire him, then go into your cellphone menu and fire him ten times in a row. You need to unlock him first, obviously.
    
25. Running Man - Escape a chase off board in career mode- You don't have to escape off board the entire way, just walk over the border where they can't get you off your board after making most of the way there on board. The curb is typically the cut-off point where you reach "Freedom!"
    
26. DIY - Spend 30 minutes moving objects in career mode- I did this by putting a rubber band around my controller to hold the R1 button down, and it worked like a charm.
    
27. Good Samaritan - Knock down a security guard chasing another skater in career mode- Don't actively try to do this, just let it happen eventually. I mean, if you see a security guard actually chasing a skater, go for him, but there's not really any way to actively pursue this achievement.
    
28. Need for Speed - Maintain maximum speed for 5 seconds in career mode - Either skitch or just go down a hill and hang on without bailing for long enough.
    
29. Sandbag - Break at least 15 bones in a single wipeout in career mode
30. Gender Bender - Change your skater's gender- In the body enhancements section of edit skater. Just change gender and change back, you won't lose anything.
    
31. Grasshopper - Perform one grass gap of at least 10 meters or 30 feet in career mode- I'll try to come up with a specific spot for this soon.
32. Stairmaster - Perform one stair gap of at least 12 meters or 36 feet in career mode- If you don't get it beforehand, you'll receive this for successfully completing the 3rd Set's a Charm mission.
    
33. Uninsurable - Break 100 bones in career mode- Just let this happen over time. This should happen pretty quickly when you start on the Hall of Meat challenges.
    
34. Playing Nice Together - Complete your first online freeskate activity with your created skater
35. Cooperation is key - Complete 50 online freeskate activities with your created skater

Silver

1. SBM Cover - Get the cover of The Skateboard Mag- Consult my Skate 2 walkthrough for Mahalo.
2. Thrasher Cover - Get the cover of Thrasher- Consult my Skate 2 walkthrough for Mahalo.
3. How you like them apples? - Acquire all phone numbers for the pros- beat all the pro missions, basically. Consult my Skate 2 walkthrough for Mahalo.
4. Anyone Else? - Beat all the pros at Throwdown challenges- requires that you get all phone numbers first.
   
5. Spare Parts - All Hall Of Meat paths complete- Hall of Meat guide coming soon on Mahalo.
   
6. Urban Legend Too - Own all spots in career mode- Check out my spot map here at Mahalo.com.
   
7. Active Skater - Successfully complete all online freeskate activities with your created skater- a rather ridiculous requirement in my opinion, a lot of work, especially if you don't have about five friends who are constantly willing to play with you online.
   
8. Online Pro - Achieve Pro Rank Online- Requires 3 bronze medals in different events and one silver one.
   
9. Taste The Mongo - Mongo Push 5000 times in career mode- Get used to pushing Mongo instead of regular. I tended to push regular out of habit, and even after playing the entire game through, I have about 3000 more Mongo pushes to do. If you can find a spot to tape the button down or something, you can do one push per second, making for 83 minutes of Mongo pushing.
   

Gold

1. Perfectionist - Complete all paths in career mode- Consult my Skate 2 walkthrough for Mahalo.
2. Online Legend - Achieve Legend Rank Online- Not the same as Icon rank, as you'd suspect because the previous two were for amateur and pro, but rather just achieve legend rank on a single event, equivalent to 5000 exp.